The phrase do not do good you will not get evil. Surely you are familiar with the Golden Rule: “Do not do good - you will not get evil. M. Zhvanetsky and folk wisdom

I'll make a reservation right away - Gossip's informal, but still ... "Today I met my acquaintance, who, when asked," How are you? " She is really a very kind person. But today she said the phrase that I hear from many people: “Do not do good, you will not get evil!” But what about the law of reflection? to you a boomerang. Also good - you do good, help people, and good returns to you in a larger size. But what happens? Some say that you need to do less good, while others try to do good deeds every day. Who is right ?! " "The road to HELL is paved with good deeds!"- Which, in turn, is explained by the fact that some people really only wanted to do something good, but it turned out completely wrong ... It largely depends on the person himself - whether he does good with self-interest and reluctantly, or simply loves to help (in the good sense of the word) ... "" It so happened that I work in a women's team. And I'm the only person who has a personal car. If they ask me for a favor to let me down, or to take with me on the way, I never refuse. Once an employee asked me to come to the station at five in the morning, as she met her boyfriend, and he was carrying a lot of things, because a taxi is too expensive. And you see for free, "in friendship". I refused and ended up on the "bad person" list. Now one of the employees asks to pick her up from the bus stop on the way to work every morning. She is always late, it makes me nervous. Go out in advance and adjust to her time, wait for her, and then rush to work faster so as not to be late already together. I tactfully refused to transport her to the place of work. .... All ...... I am the enemy of the people number one. So I can't understand whether skis do not go ... or ..... people are stupidly arrogant ????? " People just want to do something at your expense:- to do some work (oh, I have a lot to do, I won't have time, oh my computer has flown, but I need to make a report, etc.). - to lend money, and a fairly large amount - to give a lift somewhere, buy something, put money on the phone - to live with you (there is nowhere to live). Yes, do not be surprised, this also occurs - to borrow some thing, moreover, rather personal (clothes, accessories, mobile phone, etc.) "Do you want to have an enemy? Lend a man money!", this is also a national experience. Have you met such cases? A person sincerely wants to help another, reacts with a soul to a request, does good, and as a result gets evil: he loses money and gains an enemy. And there are many such situations. It happens that you just do not want to offend a person and you borrow money, or something else, and then: neither the person, nor the money. How to deal with this? Here are some tips: 1. To cultivate a healthy egoism in oneself, the habit of putting one's own interests first (especially in comparison with the interests of people who like to "ride" others). 2. Ability to clearly say NO (and sometimes send a person if he does not understand). 3. Love for yourself, the ability to value yourself (and the understanding that you are the only one with yourself) and not give yourself offense. 4. Clearly and understandably explain that you will not do someone else's work (you also have a lot to do). 5. Do not pay attention to criticism in your address, stop communicating with such a person. 6. Always put your business first. 7. Try not to follow the "lead" of others. 8. Try to avoid subtle "manipulators", and people who take away your precious time. 9. Never allow people to "take advantage" of your kindness. 10. Stand your ground, do not yield. 11. Don't let people "sit" on your neck. Well, and most importantly: you have one life, do not waste time on "unnecessary" things for you, do not waste your precious time and nerves ...

Do not do good - you will not get evil. Of course, you don't need to be so categorical. But this proverb has taken root among the people for a reason. Somehow it is too often, helping someone, trusting, a person turns out to be "fools" or becomes a victim of deception. Here we are not even talking about gratitude, but about the fact that a person suffers from his good. For example, knowing the kindness of People's Artist Yuri Nikulin, people often came to him and asked for money. He helped everyone. And, as his relatives said, the people whom he helped, to put it mildly, were not always in need. This is a harmless example. And how many cases were there when, for example, letting in a stranger from the street for the night, the owner of the apartment turned out to be robbed, and in the worst case, killed. On this topic, we are talking with the priest Vladislav Chernets.

- Father Vladislav, the expression "Do not do good - you will not get evil" is, of course, too categorical, but it cannot be denied altogether. Why does a person pay for good?

- When a person does good, he should not demand either from God or from people to return it. In the Christian understanding, doing good is the fulfillment of the main commandment of Christ: love one another (John 15, 12). The Lord in the Gospel clearly says that it is not enough to love those who love us, for the Gentiles do the same. Christian love consists in complete selfless self-giving: love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who offend you and persecute you (Matthew 5:44). God allows the wiles of the evil one for our salvation, so that we learn patience and humility. If we do not do good, then we cannot know how imperfect in our good deeds. After all, doing good, a person in most cases requires a "barter exchange". The providence of God works in a completely different way. For our salvation, so that a person learns more about himself, sees his sinfulness, evil in himself, we are sometimes really rewarded with evil for good.

- How do you think it has always been in Russia, or have cases of black ingratitude become more frequent in recent decades?

- And not only in Russia, but throughout the world since the fall of our forefathers. In the Bible, we see many examples of this topic... Ingratitude for the good that we do to people is given to us by God for humility and knowledge of our own soul. The relationship between God and man, doing good and striving for the Almighty are eternal questions, and the rest changes in the world as an external manifestation of life. Therefore, as in times ancient Russia, and in our time, these questions are always relevant for a person.

- Perhaps there is a recipe for this? Maybe you just don’t need to offer help to people or, roughly speaking, “go in with your good”?

- To this St. Tikhon of Zadonsk replied very well: “Avoid evil and do good for the sake of God, and not for any other reason: therefore, avoid evil, because He has forbidden it, and therefore do good because God commanded it. For all that is not pleasing to God that is not done for the sake of God. May the will of God, which does not want evil and wants good, be the goal in all your deeds. "

And concerning “to climb with your good,” the same saint subtly remarked: “Do not do what your conscience forbids you to do, for what an infallible conscience forbids, it also forbids the law of God. A good conscience agrees with the law of God. The law of God says: “Do not kill, do not steal,” and so on - you hear the same in your conscience, and it says the same to you. Beware of doing what your conscience forbids, so as not to hurt your soul by hurting your conscience. " Thus, the saint advises us: if we live according to our conscience, the world will be much kinder, and the same is true in personal relationships between people.

- Can we say that good has back side? When, while doing good, a person, unwillingly, does evil. For example, a grandmother supplies money to a grandson, and he spends it on alcohol?

- The Holy Fathers say that the main virtue is discretion. If our help indulges drunkenness, passions and just human laziness, then this help is a "disservice". One Russian proverb says: "If you want to help another, give him not a fish, but a fishing rod." That is, if you want to help a person - help, but so that he can prevail over the flesh and passions. Of course, it is necessary to support a person, to help him in a difficult moment, but the person himself must always make efforts for his correction and repentance. After all, repentance means not only an “act of destruction”, but a change, transformation of one's own mind, a change in one's own life, work on oneself, living according to the commandments. That is, repentance in the full sense is a process of soul transformation, a process of ascent to God, and this work cannot be easy.

- What is the right way to do good? Perhaps you don't need to be overly compassionate to do this? Maybe you should be tougher and cooler?

- In no case should you do this, because it contradicts both the Christian way of life and is not inherent in man and his conscience in general. As the Christian apologist Tertullian put it: "The soul of man is by nature a Christian." Therefore, you need to do things without generating evil. The Monk Pimen the Great said: “Malice does not destroy malice. But if someone does evil to you, you do good to that person, so that by good deed you destroy malice. " This is how Christian kindness works.

- Have there been any cases in your practice when parishioners “paid for the best”?

- Yes, of course, there were such cases in my priestly ministry. And I remember the words: be wise as serpents, and simple as doves (Matt. 10, 16). Indeed, in this advice, one does not exclude the other, but complements, and in different life circumstances both wisdom and simplicity are needed. Remarkable are the words of the Monk Mark the Ascetic: "Rejoice, not immediately after you have done good to someone, but when you endure the trial that follows without rancor." That is, we need not to be conceited and “rest on our laurels,” but to humbly be ready to do good again and again in the name of God, despite our clumsiness, unfavorable circumstances and the opposition of the evil one.

Natalia Koloyarova, g"Courier of the Volga Region" newspaper

"Do not do good - you will not get evil." Unfortunately, this rule almost always works, but why is this happening?

If you are a naturally kind person, then you probably know Golden Rule: "Do not do good - you will not get evil." Unfortunately, it almost always works, but why is this happening?

If this question has appeared in your head at least once, then I strongly advise you to read this parable, in it you will find the answer, and most importantly, you will understand how to live with the injustice of the world.

Once a young stranger knocked on the door of the old sage and, bursting into tears, told the elder her story.

I don't know how I can continue to live ... - she said with trepidation in her voice. - All my life I treated people as I would like them to treat me, be sincere with them and open my soul to them ... Whenever possible, I tried to do good to everyone, without expecting anything in return, I helped as much as I could. I really did it all for free, but in return I received evil and ridicule. I am hurt to the point of pain and I am simply tired ... I beg you, tell me, how can I be?

The sage listened patiently and then gave the girl advice:

Strip naked and walk completely naked through the streets of the city, - said the old man calmly.

Forgive me, but I have not yet come to this ... You are probably out of your mind or kidding! If I did this, I don't know what to expect from passers-by ... You look, someone else will dishonor or abuse me ...

The sage suddenly got up, opened the door and put a mirror on the table.

You are ashamed to go out naked, but for some reason you are not at all ashamed to walk around the world with a naked soul, open like this door, wide open. You let all and sundry go there. Your soul is a mirror, which is why we all see the reflection of ourselves in other people. Their soul is full of evil and vices - it is such an ugly picture that they see when they look into your pure soul. They lack the strength and courage to admit that you are better than them and change. Unfortunately, this is only the lot of the truly brave ...

What should I do? How can I change this situation if, in fact, nothing depends on me? - asked the beauty.

Come with me, I'll show you something ... Look, this is my garden. For many years now, I have been watering and taking care of these beautiful flowers. To be honest, I have never seen the buds of these flowers bloom. All that I had to contemplate was the beautiful blossoming flowers that beckon with their beauty and fragrant aroma.

Child, learn from nature. Look at these wonderful flowers and do as they do - open your heart in front of people carefully so that no one even notices it. Open your soul good people... Get away from those who cut off your petals, throw them under your feet and trample. These weeds have not yet grown to you, so there is nothing you can do to help them. In you they will only see an ugly reflection of themselves.