A black streak began in life, how to deal with failures. How to get rid of bad luck. Causes of a losing streak How to deal with bad luck

Everyone has had to fail, after which people either continue to act or abandon the goal. How to cope with failures in order to achieve desire? It all depends on the behavior of the brain and the influence of the environment. A new study shows that treating failure as inevitable mistakes to learn from helps people succeed in the future.

Jameel Bhanji, a neuroscientist at Rutgers University in New Jersey, says there are two examples of attitudes toward failure. Firstly, there are aspects that people can control, for example, exams, if a person fails the test, then he knows what needs to be done to fix it. Secondly, there are situations that do not depend on people, in the case of training, there are too many loads and fatigue that do not allow you to study, even if you really want to.

Regardless of what caused the frustration, there are plenty of ways to deal with the same problem in the future. Having failed the exam, the student can analyze their mistakes and correct them in the future in order to study the subject better for the next test (subject-oriented approach). But there are people who can't let go of emotions, they are more suited to an emotionally oriented approach, for example, a salesperson may feel unhappy, but convince themselves that everything will look better in the morning.

Bhanji's team set out to find out what other strategies people use to move forward after failure. To do this, they brought 30 volunteers to the laboratory and invited them to play computer games. The game simulated a training course and the goal was to complete the training. Volunteers who completed the task earned $10.

Training was not an easy task, after failure, players from one group could return their characters to the beginning of the game, in another the program sent them on its own. For example, in the first group, after the correct answer to the test, the character could move forward, in case of failure, the player had to send him to the beginning in order to play the game again. In the second, the character started the passage from the beginning and the volunteers did not participate in this in any way. After each failure, the players were asked if they wanted to continue.

During the experiments, scientists studied the brain activity of volunteers using MRI. During brain activity, blood flow increases in some areas, and the device detects this. The researchers observed where blood flow increased when players decided to try again.

The scientists found that when players were faced with a choice problem, activity in the ventral striatum, the part of the brain responsible for motivation and the desire to try again, changed. When the players controlled the rollback of the game, the activity in this area was much lower, and the chance that the volunteer would continue the game was higher.

The decrease in activity in this area is not associated with pleasant sensations, it captures the wrong state of affairs. But at the same time, there is a feeling that next time it will be possible to do everything better. When players experienced course cancellation beyond their control, activity in the ventromedial prefrontal cortex dropped. Areas responsible for controlling emotions and making decisions. The less activity there was, the more likely the players would not give up.

This shows that after failures beyond the control of the person, realizing that this was not due to your own actions and you cannot fix it, the person should pay more attention to his emotions and try to change the emotional state. This allows you to move forward.

stress and failure

Stress is often the cause of failure, which prompted Bhanji and his team to repeat the experiment with some additions. Participants, before they started the game, were subjected to mild stress, forcing them to immerse their hands in ice water. The first group, which could influence the process, tried to reach the end of the game again and again, the second group, which did not control what was happening, most likely refused. Stress reduced control over emotions, and the motivation to continue learning from failures disappeared.

This study shows what helps people overcome setbacks. According to Dr. Bhanji, most obstacles are not completely under the control of people or beyond their control at all. If you focus only on those parts that are under the direct influence of a person, then he will be more persistent even in times of stress. In addition, the experiment refutes the theories of some gurus that a person is to blame for all his failures, as he does something wrong.

Every person has experienced adversity in life. But usually these are short-term moments that you quickly forget about. But there are people who are always, everywhere and in everything unlucky. It seems that their life is filled with a series of insurmountable troubles in life. Whatever they undertake, whatever they undertake, everything ends in failure. Sometimes it seems that they just attract trouble. How to deal with bad luck to such people and what to do, let's try to figure it out in this article.

What is a chronic loser?

Not only magicians and healers, but modern psychologists are interested in such a subject as chronic bad luck. In modern psychology, concepts such as “chronic streak of failures” or “chronic loser” began to appear. Systematizing their observations, psychologists specified the signs of a “chronic loser”:

1. Distrust in yourself and the world around you;
2. Aggression towards other people;
3. Lack of confidence in oneself, one's strengths and abilities;
4. Feeling of complete loneliness;
5. Resentment at the whole environment and the world;
6. Feeling of inner emptiness.

Such manifestations of a psychological state can occur in many people. Therefore, psychologists attribute such manifestations to a long-term, protracted condition that can trigger a reaction of chronic bad luck.

Signs of bad luck

The first signs of bad luck appear at home. A harbinger of a future series of problems is the inexplicable rapid deterioration of essential products. If recently purchased bread quickly acquires a strange smell and becomes covered with mold, this is the first sign of impending bad luck.

The next sign is when family members for no reason begin to complain about life, list all their failures and problems. It is worth reducing your communication with such an “unlucky person” to a minimum, because bad luck is contagious and spreads very quickly.

Occult Causes of Bad Luck

Getting into the "black band" a person begins to look for the causes of its occurrence. They can be divided into two types: occult and psychological.

Occult reasons include:

• Negative karma;
• Self-evil eye, that is, there was a lot of talk and boasting around a deed not yet done;
• Own attitude to a bad set of circumstances, lack of personal luck, negative thoughts;
• The presence of entities inside a person and settlers;
• Curse, corruption and evil eye.

Psychological causes of bad luck

Modern science does not believe in the possibility of the occult origin of the "black stripe". Therefore, he believes that before going to magicians and healers, you need to understand the true causes of failure, among which are:

1. Own laziness. It prevents you from being successful in life. Therefore, it is easier for a lazy person to admit that he is “chronically unlucky” than to accept that he simply does nothing for his own success;
2. Not the ability to rejoice in trifles;
3. Lack of logical thinking. A person cannot create a logical chain from planning actions to their reproduction, implementation and “debriefing”;
4. Complexity. Very often, indecisive and shy people become losers;
5. Excessive secrecy;
6. Lack of intuition. The lack of an inner voice can lead to a number of failures and problems;
7. Misjudgment of the problem. For example, having lost a good job, a potential loser will blame anyone for this, but not that he simply did not fit the position and did not cope with his duties at all.

The reasons given are the general excuses of a person who does not want to be responsible for his actions and deeds. Focusing on failures and falling into depression will not bring luck. It is necessary to analyze each unsuccessful situation in order to understand how to get rid of bad luck.

Psychological methods of dealing with bad luck

"Chronic bad luck" can be attributed to pathological conditions that must be dealt with. There are two ways to deal with bad luck: folk remedies and the help of a psychologist.

Psychologists have come up with some great tips for dealing with bad luck:

• Turn on willpower. You should not associate all your failures with evil fate, you just need to realistically assess the situation, pull yourself together and solve the problem;
• Strict adherence to the daily routine;
• Understanding the desired goal and working towards its achievement. That is, on a piece of paper you need to clearly state your goals and desires and evaluate the possibility of achieving them. Then prescribe a clear plan for achieving the immediate goal, preferably with execution dates, and clearly follow it;
• Self-hypnosis. It is necessary to raise your own self-esteem with the help of auto-training. A self-confident person will achieve success faster than one who does not believe in himself;
• Working with the environment. You need to try to communicate with lucky and successful people, and not with those who endlessly complain about life.

Non-traditional methods of dealing with bad luck

Very often the question "What to do if you're not lucky?" the person receives the answer: "You need to go to the grandmother and remove the damage." Rationally thinking people will smile at this answer. A person who believes in the impact of negative energy, damage or the evil eye will begin to look for a grandmother, healer or psychic who will help to cope with this problem.

Before making an appointment with the representatives of alternative medicine in the hope that conspiracies and stonecrop aura will help get rid of bad luck, it is worth trying some unconventional methods of getting rid of bad luck at home:

1. Salt as a means of combating bad luck. Healers advise an unlucky person to throw a handful of salt over their left shoulder and pray to God for the removal of bad luck;
2. Prayer for failure. With such a prayer, you need to turn to the Guardian Angel. The words of prayer must come from the heart. But before this ritual, one should consecrate the house and attend a service in the church and confess;
3. Charm making. It is necessary to take threads of seven colors: red, orange, green, yellow, blue, indigo and violet. Each thread is a symbol of a certain energy message against failure. The amulet is made to be worn on the wrist. After making the amulet, a close person of the loser must fix the amulet on the left wrist with the help of seven knots. With the help of such a talisman, all negative energy should be pumped out of a potential loser.

But chronic losers are not born, they become. A person drives himself into this position, first of all - with his own words. We must not forget that our words and thoughts affect the course of life and the constant appeal to the topic of failures attracts problems and troubles.

If one of your friends, faced with a bad situation, each time uses phrases like “I knew it would happen!”, “I’m always unlucky”, “I didn’t even doubt that I had nothing succeed”, etc. - know that in front of you is a future chronic loser. He himself programs the negative in his life.

Pay attention to this detail: in the house of people who consider themselves losers, bread becomes moldy much faster, food spoils, flowers wither, animals get sick, etc. This is how the environment reacts to constant complaints and lamentations about bad luck.

Looking for the positive in every negative situation

The easiest and most effective way to deal with failures is an active life position. Even if something bad happened, try to find your pluses in the echo event and focus on them.

Scratched your car? The paint has already come off in places anyway, and now you will definitely have to give the car for service, but it will be as good as new!

Did your boss force you to redo a poorly prepared report? I'll have to sit on it at home, but then I will grow professionally, I will have the opportunity to excel.

The guy didn't show up for the date? Well, there was a free evening, after all, I dreamed for so long that I would have it - and I will completely devote it to idleness. That is, you mentally turn a big failure into a small luck and try to enjoy it. According to the principle “nature has no bad weather”: in the world there is no only bad and only good, everything depends on our assessments of this or that event.

When to work and when to rest

What else needs to be done? Here are some specific recommendations from psychologists.

1. You should not be lazy and complain about the lack of time. Make a list of tasks with an exact date for their completion - and consider each of them as another victory over failures. At the same time, do not go to the other extreme - know how to relax, enjoy free minutes. Don't dwell on the past and don't spend too much time daydreaming about the future. Live for today!
2. If you have to do several things in a row, start with the most unpleasant. And then tell yourself that it's already done!
3. Do not consider that you are the worst of all, help others, feeling your strength and ability to do something positive.

Physiologists have found that in stressful situations that occur during a losing streak, many people have only one hemisphere: if the left one, the person works normally through force, if the right one, he tries to do nothing. Both are bad, but there are exercises to get out of this state.

You can read poems aloud - this contributes to the coordinated work of both hemispheres, because speech is regulated by the left, and rhythm - by the right. And while talking on the phone, put the receiver to the right, then to the left ear. Thus, you activate both hemispheres and increase the level of vital energy.

Evil eye - the cause of bad luck?

Bad luck may be due to the fact that you were jinxed. To remove someone else's spell, you should resort to a magical rite. I would recommend a simple and effective spell for good luck, which is done with a handful of ordinary flour. Place it in a cup and for nine days, repeat the plot over it three times a day:

“A man was going to the mill in a cart. The misfortune-sadness-mayata fell from him and stuck to me. I'll tear it off myself, I'll take it to the mill. There, her millstones will be ground, ground, remade. Trouble will come out - not a problem, but flour, full of good luck. I will powder myself with flour from head to toe, I will attract happiness and luck in life.

After the conspiracy has been uttered for the last time, throw a handful of flour up and stand under this cloud.

Another rite is performed on millet porridge with honey. Prepare it on the night of the new moon. Before dawn, go to the window, which is closer to the east, light a candle, circle the window frame with it. Then put a candle on the windowsill and start eating porridge, saying:

“Luck and luck, come eat porridge, look at me, admire, stay with me.”

Leave some porridge on the plate - and do not remove it from the windowsill until the candle burns out. In the morning, take the rest of the food outside for birds or stray animals.

Remember that the main thing in the fight against bad luck is not to succumb to despondency and not give up. Believe that happiness and good luck will definitely come!

Among our environment you can find amazingly lucky and unlucky people. Some seem to be helped by some kind of supernatural powers, because any business and undertaking will certainly end in success, while for others, on the contrary, everything goes awry, and failures follow one after another. But what is luck really?

Psychologists say that it's all about the inner mood of a person and his readiness to take advantage of the opportunities that life offers. It turns out that our own psychological attitude puts spokes in our wheels. So, what are the main causes of bad luck and how to fix them?

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1. Belief in your “bad luck”

It's like the "black cat effect" when the mind looks for patterns and associates failures with phenomena that are not at all related to them. As soon as a cat crosses our path, we begin to expect trouble. If everything goes well, the incident is forgotten. But in the event of a negative situation, we decide that the omen is true.

Exit. Do not shift the responsibility for the problems in life to bad luck, supernatural forces and external circumstances. The root is always in your actions, and only in your actions! You can always influence your own life.

2. Self-sabotage

It occurs when, in reality, we do not want to get a certain result and therefore frustrate our own efforts to achieve it. For example, the need to take an exam in a hated subject just because the parents want it that way. In this case, a person manages to oversleep, forget key information during the answer, lose a pass to the university ... The subconscious is simply looking for a way to self-sabotage.

Exit. To honestly answer the question: “What bad thing will happen if I achieve this goal?”

3. Evaluative psychology

“I'm not lucky, but my neighbor's…” People tend to show the positive aspects of life and hide the troubles. We know a lot of good and little bad about others, but about ourselves - everything good and everything bad. The balance is clearly not in our favor: the neighbor will always seem to be luckier. In addition, an internal filter works here, thanks to which we fully note the negative, and downplay the positive and achievements.

Exit. You need to compare yourself not with others, but with yourself: what you were recently and what you have become now.

4. Errors in assessing the chances of an eye

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"I've already bought 100 lottery tickets and still haven't won anything!" Yes, it is normal. Lottery, roulette and other gambling games are statistically disadvantageous. Surprisingly, we tend to underestimate probabilities. Example: What are the chances that at least two children in a school class will have the same birthday? Answer: about 50%.

Exit. Did a chain of bad events happen? Calculate the probability. You can’t do it yourself - ask a familiar mathematician. Intuition, alas, does not work with complex calculations, it is important to always remember this.

5. Double standards

When something good happens, we are sure: "This is how it should be." But if bad things happen, we immediately affirm: "I'm not lucky."

Exit. Take a piece of paper and write down all the events for the day, for the week, for the month, including the expected ones. This will ensure that you have the usual level of luck.

When everything goes upside down, falls out of hand and turns into a real nightmare, when a black streak began in life, then you want to scream in a fit of rage, blame the lazy gods for yours and run, run away from people, bad news and this black streak, which there is no end. We all faced such days, we all felt their destructive power over us, but is it possible to resist? Our answer is yes. And now we will look at 10 ways to deal with bad days.

Let there be no black stripes in life! 10 ways to solve.

1. Refuse isolation.

The first reaction when we feel bad is to isolate ourselves from the problem by isolating ourselves from the external environment and its irritants. There is a desire to close in the room and indulge in gloomy. But the only chance to get support is to stay in the circle of really close people, to speak out, handing oneself over to their unobtrusive care.

2. Control "pleasures".

You should not go into the gap and break loose, indulging the inner "demons". Of course, you can get drunk with grief and forget everything, you can leave the diet in the past by buying half a ton of donuts for the evening, or take a beauty at the bar. However, the loss of control has not yet led to anything other than additional problems.

3. Concentrate on cleaning.

When everything is bad, we cannot control events, the best thing to do is clean up. Clean up the rubble at home or in the office, wash the mountains of dishes, sort out unnecessary junk, throw out the trash. Such an action is deeply symbolic, as it allows you to clear the internal through the external, to make room for new thoughts.

4. Look at the situation from a different angle.

The life situation cannot consist only of black, the main thing is to learn to see the event from different angles. Have you been fired? But now you know what you want to devote the rest of your life to. Or you broke your leg, but now you don’t have to go on an ill-fated business trip for six months, leaving your family, you were sent on a paid “vacation”.

5. Recall other aspects of life.

10 years to build a career - and down the drain? Or have you been abandoned by a loved one with whom you lived together for 15 years? This is an occasion to reorient to new areas of life, because the world is so multifaceted! How long have you been traveling, attending to your hobbies, or visiting old friends? Sometimes it opens from a new unexpected side.

6. Go in for sports.

The surest solution when it’s bad is to go to the gym and throw out all the accumulated anger in the classroom. Put a high speed on the treadmill, beat the pear, convey despair in the dance. This method perfectly helps to maintain control over yourself and lose extra pounds.

7. Look to the future.

If an event occurs in your life that poisons all bright thoughts with negativity, think about whether the problem will remain relevant in a month or six months? Will you remember her with the same hatred in 5-10 years? Sometimes what seems to us the height of disappointment is just a soap bubble that is not worth it.

8. Pour irritation onto paper.

If day after day the brain is tormented by the same one, write it down on paper, giving a verbal embodiment. For example, you are tired of family life, but you do not know how to change it. Take a pen and describe your feelings, guaranteed that the super-serious event will lose its awesome appearance, and the solution will come from the second paragraph.

9. Do a good deed.

It really works! A person is a selfish creature, but as soon as he performs a selfless act, does something good for no reason, he naturally jumps up. Give a compliment, treat a friend with a donut, give way to an old man - and you will immediately feel that you are worth something in this life.

10. Stay grateful.

This situation is now seen as a real disaster, but think how much could have happened, but did not happen! You lost your home, but you still have relatives and friends who can shelter you. You do not have a job, but nothing threatens you and your life. Are you expecting a baby at the wrong time? Think how many families dream of such an opportunity. Life does not give those trials that we cannot bear. It could have been ten times worse...

Appreciate what you have. Be, and the world will open up new opportunities!